Happy Birthday, Elwood!!!

Jake NEVER forgets!!


OK - We're pissing ourselves laughing over here!

We are SOOO proud of you guys!
Way to KICK ASS!!!

At least now our reason for watching "Glee" is justified...

The only thing that would have made Beck's rally a success...

Lest we forget (look at photos on bottom)

Ahhh, Facebook - we love your sense of humor

This falls into the "Are you fucking kidding us?" category...

With absolutely no apologies to the "Haves" out there
(who in reality are handily outnumbered by the "Have Nots"),
we can now proudly state that we firmly believe:


"Greedy Old People"

Sonofabitch!! We got it right for a change!!!

God bless America, the GOP and the Tea-Baggers!!

Road trip...

We'd say that is a no-brainer...

"This is the way the fucking world ends. Not with a bang, with a whimper, and with a whimper I'm fuckin' splitting, Jack!"

- Dennis Hopper
(1936 - 2010)

Look, American oil-rich politicians - you are fucking up my world  with your greed and ego.

Lena Horne
(1917 - 2010)
A remembrance

That'll be the fucking day...

Why not? 'Tis the season, and you'll always get dates...


Let's give this a look, shall we?

Health Care Reform for Americans
Iraq War for Daddy, Halliburton and other deep pockets
$ 940 billion
$ 1-3 trillion
Somebody tell the Republicans to STFU
and go back to counting their money!

See? Republicans aren't so prickish after all!

Now we know what those "Tea Parties" are all about!!!

Jake finally got off his ass last night and went to the Jag Star CD release party at the Square Room.
The group kicked ass as usual, and "singing for two" Sarah amazed us with the way she could still belt at full volume with that baby head-butting her.
New CD is "Static Bliss", and here is the "Pressure" video.

It's BBQ time in Tennessee!!

What do you think, numbnuts?

The Oscars dance crew - gonna be one Helluva party!!

You know you want to go - admit it!!

OK, I swore we wouldn't beat this to death, but our good buddy Tom sent this short "Note from Marion County" and a
GREAT link - enjoy!!

Leno should team up with Bret Favre and learn the meaning of "retire with dignity"...

Perfect fit!

Now if we could just drop the big one on the company picnic,
the world would be closer to being shit-free!

Happy Birthday


Happy Birthday, Elwood!!!

Here are the words you always want to hear...

...but they usually don't come from her...

Palin blasts health care reform...

Hey Sarah - what's in your wallet?

Love, peace, and "Hey man, are you holding?"
Thanks, "Sneaky Andi"...

We knew there was another reason we loved Cat Deeley!!

It's the End of Days!
Republicans strike!!!

Dear God...

Southern Republicans -

Hopefully God's last joke...

Oh God, another season begins...Watch out, AJ's!!!

Where do you think she learned this little move?
We doubt that Adam Shankman taught her...

Congratulations, Jeanine!!!

Last interview (watch the solo at 2:15 - it'll rock your world)
Jeanine and Brandon's killer paso

She's still got it!
And check out Jeff Healey's playing on "Believer"

A legend passes...

Walter Cronkite
(1916 - 2009)

Good - now maybe he can afford a razor...

Been one insanely bad week, y'all...

Sam Butera
Hey, Marie)
(1928 - 2009)

And round one goes to Kara DioGuardi

Posted in the Broward Sun-Sentinel:
"Kara cooked that bitch in every way imaginable tonight...."

For those of you who missed the most interesting season finale ever...

Still confused???

America, you suck!!

Are you a Fringe Fan?

Jake's Evil Twin

1933 - 2009

RIP, dammit...

Thank God the wait is over...

Hungry? Now I know why I watch "Top Chef"...

Uh oh - looks like Miley's met Elwood!

And the magic continues...

What a horrible waste of an exquisite lap...

Leedy Armstrong
1955 - 2009
You were right, sometimes the demons win..

Jake and Elwood's Math Class

See? Numbers can be FUN!!!

Back in the saddle again...

The last farewell...

Our friend Laura complimented us by saying, "I wish that music history genius would post something besides tits and Bush."
But when one stumbles upon Miley Cyrus trying to look grown-up, we couldn't help ourselves.

So *this* is what all the hubbub is about?

Welcome to New Orleans!!

Forrest J Ackerman

1916 - 2008

His magazine got Jake through the early years...

Now that's our idea of devotion!!!

It's Elwood's birthday!
Can I get a thumbs-up for him??

Still hot...

Wall Street, 2008
(Thanks, Mary)

Paul Newman

1925 - 2008

Lipstick on a pig, glitter on a dunce's cap...
Still a pig...
Still a dunce...

Little George's new job next February - answering the phones at FEMA.

Two losers bound together for eternity...

Uh oh, looks like SHE's met Elwood, too...

Lifted from perezhilton.com

Isaac Hayes
1942 - 2008

Mama Mia!!!

Elwood, this is NOT what I meant by "having a woman over for dinner"...

Thanks, Becky - used with her permission.

Thank you, Mister President...
Your leg-ass-y will not soon be forgot...

Term's almost over - time to tidy up...

Thank you, Mister President...

Arthur C. Clarke
1917 - 2008

"Kids, stay in school!!" -- James Brown
Thanks, Ashley (Used with her permission)

We interrupt this program to bring you a special
news bulletin...

Thanks, Lilly

Sorry, had to recycle this one...

Elwood sayz, "If you could look into eyes like these - where else would you go?"
Thanks Sarah, used with her permission.

OK - back to the basics - friends who send fansigns.
Elwood's in love again!
Thank you, Stacy!

Where's London?

Jake and Elwood's favorite kick-ass model
(Warning - site NOT PG rated, thank God) is embarking on a nationwide photoshoot prior to "officially retiring" to return to school (our loss)
Follow her progress and other obervations here.
(Photo used with her permission)

We don't care what they say - sometimes press photos can be downright sexy!
So long, Celine, you had a Helluva run!

Jake prepares for the holidays

And Elwood gives me shit for having a major in English literature...

(Thanks Ashleigh - used with her permission)

"Dammit, Elwood ate all the chocolate again!!!"
(c) Rich Mohr - Used with permission

Now I know why Elwood raids my refrigerator at 2 am!!!
(c) Dan Lippitt - used with permission

"He said Phil Spector, seconds after the gunshot, literally had the smoking gun in his hand, in his right hand, across his waist," Jackson said. "He literally had Lana Clarkson's blood on his hand. He looked Adriano De Souza right in the face, they were standing four to six feet apart ... and Phil Spector looks at him and says, 'I think I killed somebody.'"

Shoulda got Britney and Lindsay's lawyers - you'd spend 12 hours picking up trash...

"It's the shame of the nation that the people of New Orleans and the Gulf Coast have been abandoned and are suffering without the most basic necessary supports while our tax dollars are directed toward war."
--- Susan L. Taylor

To Hell with crop circles - we couldn't have said it better!
Take your Google Earth to
42° 15' 14.44" N and 71° 16' 11.42" W

If you must waste booze, at least Layne knows how to do it!
(Used with permission)

Uh oh - looks like she met Elwood...
(Thanks, Laura)

Time to reflect on the important things in life...

Steve LaGalleria @2006 - used with permission

Elwood's in mourning...

Good luck, Kat - we will all miss you!

"Fire up a colortini, sit back, relax, and watch the pictures, now, as they fly through the air."

Tom Snyder
1936 - 2007

Thanks, Randi - South Africa is lucky...

Cold out there, Mandy? Looking a little nipply from here...

Thanks, Christine - we knew your Aussie soul would come through!

If you dont feel it - don't play it! We love you, Danielle...


She'll kill us - but reviving a past image with a message:
"Music is passion"
Conduct your ass off, Lee Ann...

If you folks don't get it - you just don't...

Hey Elwood, your martini's ready...
(Thanks, Sandy - used with permission)

Thanks, Maryanne...we need all the help we can get :-)

Any questions?

Thank God somebody's got the right idea!!!

OK - we'll admit we have had some pretty cool fansigns over the years, but this tops them all! Thanks, Jess!!!!

Now that's what we're talking about!!

Sigh, the boobs and legs are gone from Idol - but good while they lasted...

Who says vinyl is dead?

We know you prefer your right side, but this shot even makes you look good :-)

These guys will NEVER work for Fox News!

This is the legacy of your beloved president,
George "W"orst Bush

Oh, Hell yeah!!!


See it - you owe it to yourself...

Michael Brecker

1949 - 2007

Looking better than ever!!!
We'll let you know how it goes.
You can hear some here...

Read faster, numb nuts...

Couldn't happen to a nicer guy...

In stores soon...

"It's a good thing I had a bag of marijuana instead of a bag of spinach. I'd be dead by now."

--- Willie Nelson

OK - In a fair fight, where would you put your money?

Good God - next question?

Welcome to New Orleans

We see Emeril's back in town :-)

Thanks to our friend Ray in New Orleans

Samantha sez:
" Why would you want to post that pic? It has no booze in it :) "
Damn, we cannot imagine why...

Maynard Ferguson

1928 - 2006

There's no one else left...

"Someone just said, 'Gabriel, move over to second trumpet,'" Schankman said from his St. Louis office. "He was the last of the greats. That era is closed. There is no Kenton, no Basie, no Ellington, and now, no Ferguson."

Born in Montreal on May 4, 1928, Ferguson said his most important musical influences were Louis Armstrong and his mother, a violinist with the Ottawa Symphony and later a school administrator.

He remembered being about 9 when he fell in love with the horn.

"I went to a church in Montreal, sort of like a Sunday school get-together," and had a chance to put a cornet to his lips, he told the St. Cloud (Minn.) Times in 2003.

"It was my first time playing the instrument," Ferguson said. "My parents were really surprised when I said, 'I have got to get me one of these.'

"I remember having the feeling after I played it that the trumpet was the instrument for me."

In retrospect, do we really care if she's dumber than a rock?

"We honestly don't think the world is ready for this."

"Mister President, what do you think of the current feelings of the American people?"

"Do you ... see the world as your personal blood-sport playground, where you can take anything you want, kill whatever you like, respect nothing nature has to offer, suffer no ramifications, and do it all on someone else's tab? Well then. You have made your choice. The GOP wants you."

 -- Mark Morford

On a more pleasant note, guess who's coming to
Food Network this fall?

Billy Preston

(1947 - 2006)

Our thought for the week...

Sometimes the journey of thousands of miles
ends very, very badly...

Truly a class act...

Gene Pitney
(1941 - 2006)

Say what you wish - this guy was awesome!

Buck Owens

(1929 - 2006)

Sneaking Super Glue into the ChapStick container...


Speaks for itself...
(Thanks, Laurie)

One of Jake's favorite photos -
Of a man long gone...
Sitting in a neighborhood now gone...
In a city pretty much gone...

You gotta be kidding us - who's next???

Wilson Pickett

1942 - 2006

One last time - "Stagger Lee"

Lou Rawls

1933 - 2006

And Jake's favorite Lou-tune, "Dead End Street" which we guarantee you have never heard - especially Elwood, who was baking his brownies at the time to Led Zepp and Pink Floyd...

How we spent our Christmas / New Year's Vacation

Next Question???

Our kinda woman :-)

Huh? Thanks, Steph...

OK - for those who are tired of our anti-idiot stuff...

Why Katrina help was late arriving...

Charles, I've finished shopping - can we leave this awful place?

Unsettling as a flier?
Naaaah - let's have another double Scotch

"Play this album to find out why your girlfriend is always pissed at you. Piano-inflected tunes chronicle a journey filled with the bad boys who've turned this sweetheart into one bad Apple. Smart, soulful vocals prove she is still a righteous female rocker who refuses to sell out."

Review of Extraordinary Machine, Stuff Magazine, November 2005

Who's tweaking those blinds?


Elwood thinks this should be our new motto...
(Thanks, Lisa)

Some photos need no comment...

Is it just us, or is this whole thing puke-worthy?


== LOSERS ==


No comment on guilt or innocence - but if you want to be acquitted in Southern California, let these people prosecute you.
They couldn't find their assholes with a funnel.

So wrong...

Bets, anyone?

That ain't right, V...

You may not like their music, but you gotta love their name...

Our thoughts exactly, Sammie...

Brilliance in advertising...

Yeah - what *he* said  :-)


Cheer up, at least we aren't in Australia!

Thanks Carrot!!

Why women live longer than men...

Larry Huff, 27, of Innerarity Point, walks down the remains of Perdido Key Drive Thursday afternoon in search of water and a phone.

Copyright 1997-2004 Pensacola News Journal

Dude - come back - surf's up!!

I wanna go back to college...

As we said earlier...

Elwood's airbag

War is Hell...

"Cocaine isn't habit forming. I should know - I've been using it for years. "
--Tallulah Bankhead

Earl says, "I think the Kansas City Star is looking for a new page editor."

The vanished hero.

Oh yeah, mama - we hear ya :-)

No wonder those reality shows get great ratings!

Gimme my beer back, dammit!

Damn, Elwood - Sarah gets classier as we get older.
New CD out - party this weekend.
We'll let you know how it goes!

An alternate view...

Elwood, why didn't *we* think of this? (I meant the T-shirt)

"Money Can't Buy You..."
Oh, forget it!

Nope, Rachael is *not* actively employed by the
Chamber of Commerce :-)


Just heading to the weekend...

None of the Australian men are safe tonite...

Ummm - no...


Dude, where's the other half of my car??

We're just glad you survived it, Elwood!

Remind me again why I quit  playing guitar?

Think there's still passion in music?

You can conduct for us anytime, Joann !

Another classic...

Elwood, have you been letting the girls sample your martinis again?

A classic...

Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes, 
and it's up to women to stomp the shit 
out of them until they turn into 
something acceptable to have dinner with.

Umm ... thanks , Amy

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All Rights Reserved